Situation · Partners and dating
“He makes me feel like I'm going crazy”
What could be going on
Gaslighting: Fits if he repeatedly denies your reality until you doubt your memory and perception.
Denies things you both saw happen: Check whether he denies events others also saw, not just disputed details.
Never wrong; rewrites history: He may rewrite history to stay blameless; check whether his version always clears him.
Invalidation: Fits if he dismisses your feelings as wrong or excessive rather than denying facts.
You feel on edge and don't know why: Feeling unsure of yourself around him is itself useful data; notice when it started.
Naive realism: Two people can sincerely remember things differently; check whether he also doubts his own memory sometimes.
Questions to carry
- The last time I doubted my memory, what had I seen or heard before he told me otherwise?
- Who outside the relationship could I tell what happened, and how would I describe it to them?
Also said as
- I'm starting to doubt my own memory because of him
- she says things never happened that I know happened
- my husband says I'm imagining things
- am I being gaslit
- he denies saying stuff I heard him say
- my partner makes me question my sanity