Changes the subject whenever death comes up
A friend mentions her father's funeral and they start talking about the football. When a film shows a deathbed, they get up to make tea.
Rule out first
A family, faith or culture where death isn't talked about in company. A recent loss they aren't ready to share with this person in particular. Plain lack of interest in the topic that day.
What could explain it
Terror management theory: The move covers death in general, their own included. Illness, aging and wills get the same treatment, with no loss of their own behind it.
Experiential avoidance: Every hard feeling gets the same move: illness, money, a row. Death is one topic among many.
Grief (complicated, disenfranchised, anticipatory): They carry a loss others don't count: an ex, a pet, a miscarriage, a friend. Nobody asked, so they stopped bringing it up.
Bereavement after a suicide: Someone close died by suicide. The subject brings shame, questions with no answer, and dread of what people will ask.
Bereavement guilt and regret (Li and Stroebe): There is a death they blame themselves for or regret. The subject brings the guilt straight back.
Alexithymia: They struggle to name any feeling. Talk of death asks for words they don't have.
A next move
Notice whether there's a loss of their own behind it. None, and the same move with illness and aging, points to terror management. The same move with every hard feeling points to wider avoidance. A loss others overlook points to unrecognized grief. A suicide or a death they blame themselves for each have their own entry. No words for any feeling points to alexithymia.
If it’s you
What do I do when death comes up, and whose death am I thinking of when I do it?