Situation · Family and friends
“My friend is always in crisis and I'm the one who fixes it”
What could be going on
Drama triangle (persecutor, victim, rescuer): Fits if she plays victim, you play rescuer and someone else is the villain.
Crisis follows them: Check whether crises cluster around her across jobs and relationships.
Compulsively rescues: Could be your pull to fix, even when not asked.
Codependency: Fits if your sense of worth depends on being needed by her.
Primary and secondary gain: Check whether crisis brings her attention or care she can't otherwise ask for.
Questions to carry
- In the last crisis, how did my friend ask for help, and who else did they ask?
- What do I get from being the one who fixes things, and what does it take from me?
Also said as
- she calls me every time her life falls apart
- friend with constant drama who drains me
- I'm always rescuing my friend from disasters
- why does my friend lurch from one crisis to the next
- friend with endless problems
- I'm always bailing my friend out