Situation · Yourself
“I'm terrified people will leave me”
What could be going on
Abandonment/instability schema: Expecting people to leave fits; check whether calm periods still feel unsafe.
Anxious-preoccupied attachment: Strong need for closeness with doubt fits; check reactions to slow replies.
Protest behaviour: Fits if fear turns into calls, sulking or tests; check what you do when scared.
Hyperactivating strategies: Turning the alarm up, scanning for signs of leaving fits.
Rejection sensitivity: Expecting rejection fits; check whether neutral moments read as signs.
Borderline personality: Only if frantic efforts to avoid abandonment sit with unstable mood and self-image.
Questions to carry
- The last time I feared someone would leave, what had they just said or not said?
- Who left, or nearly left, early in my life, and how did I learn about it?
Also said as
- fear of abandonment
- I always think my partner will dump me
- my girlfriend panics when I don't text back
- I'm scared everyone will leave eventually
- I'm scared of being abandoned
- why do I think everyone will leave me