Situation · Family and friends
“My sister always plays the victim”
What could be going on
Always the victim: Fits if she is the injured one in almost every story she tells.
Drama triangle (persecutor, victim, rescuer): Check whether others are cast as persecutor or rescuer around her.
Primary and secondary gain: Could be victimhood bringing sympathy or relief from responsibility.
Vulnerable (covert) narcissism: Fits if she nurses grievances and feels unrecognised.
Family roles (golden child, scapegoat, lost child, mascot): Check whether she was actually treated unfairly growing up; some grievances are real.
Questions to carry
- Who did my sister tell the last time she was the one wronged, and what did she want from them?
- Which part do I end up playing in her stories, and how do I feel in it?
Also said as
- my brother turns every problem into how hard done by he is
- she makes herself the victim in every family argument
- sibling who is always the injured party
- why does my sister always feel hard done by
- sister with a victim mentality
- my sister thinks everyone is against her