Situation · Family and friends
“My best friend has gone distant and I don't know why”
What could be going on
Withdrawn and low for weeks: Fits if they've withdrawn from everyone for weeks, not only you; ask gently how they are.
Major depression: Could be low mood on their side; check for loss of interest, sleep changes, cancelled plans.
Rupture and repair: Check whether something went unrepaired between you; asking directly often starts repair.
Dismissive-avoidant attachment: Fits if they withdraw whenever closeness or need grows.
Personalisation: Check whether you assume it's about you when they may be busy or struggling.
Questions to carry
- When did I first notice the distance, and what was going on in my friend's life around then?
- Which explanation do I keep coming back to, and what does it say about me?
Also said as
- my friend stopped replying and seems cold
- she's pulling away and won't say what's wrong
- close friend suddenly withdrawn
- did I do something wrong, my friend is ignoring me
- my best friend is acting distant
- friend pulling away for no reason