You feel irritated and want to push them
They haven't done anything wrong, but everything they say grates, and you're sharper with them than with anyone else.
Rule out first
You're stressed. There's a real conflict you haven't named. They're doing something that would irritate most people.
What could explain it
Shadow: They show a trait you've disowned (neediness, showing off, weakness); the irritation is out of proportion and about you.
Passive aggression: They're angry and not showing it; you feel the anger they won't own.
Masochistic (self-defeating) character: They seem to invite mistreatment, and you find yourself pulled to give it, then feel bad.
Projective identification: The irritation appears quickly and feels foreign, as if it were put into you.
Over-functioning and under-functioning: They under-function and you carry the load; the irritation is about unfairness, not personality.
Intersubjectivity and relational psychoanalysis (Stolorow, Mitchell): The irritation belongs to the pairing: others find them fine, and the pattern tightens the more you push. Part of what you're reacting to is being made between you.
A next move
Name precisely what irritates you. If it's a trait you dislike in yourself, it's shadow; if others feel it too, look at them; if you're doing their work, it's the load.
If it’s you
What in them do I refuse to see in me?