Sudden rage over something small
A changed meeting time or a dirty mug, and they're shouting, red, unable to stop for a minute or two.
Rule out first
Sleep loss, hunger, pain, alcohol. A pile of real grievances the small thing finally tipped. Medication changes.
What could explain it
Stress response and allostatic load: New behaviour under a long run of stress; it goes when the stress does.
Displacement: The anger belongs elsewhere: the boss, the marriage. The small thing is a safe target.
Triggers: The small thing resembles something from a past threat (being ignored, being controlled), and the reaction looks like fear as much as anger.
Narcissistic rage: The trigger is a slight to status (being kept waiting, being corrected in front of others) and the rage is aimed at humiliating the other person.
Emotional dysregulation: It happens across many situations, the anger takes a long time to come down, and they're often ashamed afterwards.
Covert depression in men (Terry Real): In a man whose fuse has shortened over months, alongside more drinking, longer hours or withdrawal at home. He denies feeling down; the irritability is the depression's visible face.
A next move
Ask them, later and calmly, what the moment meant. 'I felt disrespected' points to injury; 'I've had it with everything' to load or displacement; 'it was like being a kid again' to triggers; 'I don't know, it just happens' to dysregulation.
If it’s you
What was the small thing standing in for?