Situation · Family and friends
“My family won't accept that I've changed”
What could be going on
Family roles (golden child, scapegoat, lost child, mascot): Fits if the family needs you in your old role to stay stable.
Differentiation of self (Bowen): Check whether you can keep your new self without needing their agreement.
Confirmation bias: Could be they notice only what fits their old picture of you.
Individuation: Becoming yourself often unsettles a family; check the pushback isn't a reason to stop.
Regression: Check whether you slip into old ways around them, confirming their view.
Questions to carry
- At the last family visit, which old story about me came up, and who told it?
- Around them, how much of the old me do I slip back into?
Also said as
- my parents still treat me like the old me
- I've grown but my family sees me the same
- why does my family keep me in a box
- they won't let me be different from who I was
- family won't accept the new me
- my family still sees me as I was