Situation · Work
“He agrees in meetings and then does the opposite”
What could be going on
Agrees in the room, resists later: Saying yes in the room and resisting afterwards fits exactly; check how often it repeats.
Passive aggression: Fits if the resistance carries hidden anger: forgetting, delays, doing it badly on purpose.
Psychological safety: Fits if disagreeing openly is risky in that room; check what happens to people who object.
People-pleasing: Fits if they hate disappointing anyone and say yes by reflex, then can't follow through.
Conflict modes (Thomas-Kilmann): An avoiding style fits; check whether they ever argue a point directly.
Defensive routines (Argyris): If the whole team does it, a habit of avoiding embarrassment may be built into meetings.
Questions to carry
- In the last meeting he agreed in, who else was in the room, and how did the decision get made?
- When I find out he went the other way, what do I do, and what do I avoid saying?
Also said as
- she says yes to my face then ignores it
- my team nods along and then nothing happens
- why does my colleague agree and then go and do his own thing
- agrees in the room, resists later
- coworker says yes then doesn't do it
- he promises in meetings and never delivers