Uses guilt to get compliance
'After everything I've done for you' or 'fine, I'll do it myself, as usual,' and you end up agreeing.
Rule out first
A real imbalance of effort they're pointing to. Cultural norms of obligation. A reasonable request made clumsily.
What could explain it
Emotional blackmail (fear, obligation, guilt): A pattern of fear, obligation and guilt applied when you say no; it escalates until you comply.
Compliance techniques (foot in the door, door in the face, low-ball): Calculated: favours come first so they can be called in later; the guilt is deliberate.
Dependent personality: They need you and the guilt comes from panic, not calculation; they're helpless if you hold firm.
Enneagram Type 2: Helper: They give a lot, expect it back unspoken, and feel hurt and unappreciated when it doesn't come.
Passive aggression: The complaint is indirect: sighs, martyrdom, sarcastic offers. They won't make the request plainly.
A next move
Say no clearly and kindly, once. Escalation points to blackmail; anxious collapse to dependence; hurt withdrawal to the giver's unspoken contract; a calculated new offer to compliance tactics.
If it’s you
When I help, am I keeping a tally I haven't told anyone about?