Drinks to unwind every night
Two glasses has become a bottle, every night, 'to switch off'.
Rule out first
Social or cultural norms. A temporary rough patch. A team or industry culture built around drinking.
What could explain it
Substance addiction: They can't cut back when they try, need more for the same effect, and hide or play down how much.
Social anxiety: The drinking clusters before and during social events and is about getting through them.
Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD): Drinking dulls nightmares, flashbacks or being on edge; sobriety makes those worse.
Experiential avoidance: Drink is one of several ways of not feeling, alongside work, screens and food.
Conformity: It's the group norm and drops away when they're somewhere else.
Addiction as an attempted solution to pain (Maté): The drinking follows particular feelings (a humiliating meeting, a lonely evening) more than social occasions, and they describe it as the only time their head goes quiet. Cutting down brings that feeling straight back.
A next move
Notice what happens on nights they can't drink, such as a dry event or illness: easy means habit or norm; irritable and preoccupied means dependence. Heavy daily drinkers should stop under medical advice, not abruptly.
If it’s you
What would I feel at eight in the evening if I didn't drink?